The Dream

Do you take bigger risks when you're happy or unhappy? Logically, you should take bigger risks when you're unhappy. There's less to lose, since you're already unhappy, and the thrill of the risk might be enough to snap you out of your funk. The common view of people who continuously make dangerous choices is that they are reckless idiots. If that's true, nothing can be done to fix the situation. But suppose the problem is that risk-takers are simply less happy than people who are cautious. Does that give you a tool to work with? Maybe. My hypothesis is that you can reduce risky behavior by increasing a person's happiness. The basic tools of happiness are diet, exercise, social support, and optimism about the future. Interestingly, none of those things need to be expensive. Here's a simple test to see the link between happiness and risky behavior. When you're in a bad mood, do you drive faster or slower?

It occurred to me recently that I have developed quite a few tricks for engineering my own happiness. Allow me to share a few. Some are more obvious than others. Food - Observe your own mood, and that of others, in the context of how recently they have eaten. If there's a hothead in your circle, notice that his anger is greatest before meals, when hunger is highest, and rarely does he explode during meals or just after. When you feel agitated, try eating some carbs. They're like a miracle drug. I suspect that anger is evolution's way of telling you to go kill something so you can eat. Exercise - When I've exercised in the past day, almost nothing bothers me. And I sleep like a pile of moss. If you think of exercise in its usual way, as one component of health, or as a way to lose weight, it's easy to skip your hour at the gym. If you think of it as the difference between a good day and a bad day, it's easier to make it a priority. Goals - I make it a habi...

I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband. My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me. On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable. Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife. And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve al...

Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg delivered a speech to the graduating class of Harvard Business School this week. As usual, it's a great speech. We have the full video here, as well as a transcript from HBS below. (HBS warned us that one of their people, not a professional transcriber, wrote up the speech, so there might be typos.) Sheryl Sandberg (MBA 1995) at HBS Class Day 2012: It’s an honor to be here today to address HBS’s distinguished faculty, proud parents, patient guests, and most important the class of 2012. Today was supposed to be a day of unbridled celebration, and I know that’s no longer true. I join all of you in grieving for your classmate….today still marks a distinct and impressive achievement for this class, so please join me in giving our warmest congratulations to the class…. When Dean Nohria asked me to speak here today, I thought, come talk to a group of people way younger and cooler than I am? I can do that, I do that every day, I like being surrounded by ...

Give me back those times when There were things I did and didn’t Stay in the sun and climb a tree Have enough money for peppermint Give me back those times when Feelings didn’t have words or voice Laughter couldn’t contain happiness Weeping was just another noise Give me back those times when We could hold hands for hours set Never once did we ask Why the girls’ hands were always wet Give me back those times when I could do things because I didn’t think If this felt wrong or right My decisions in eyes’ blink Not once did I know I wont have these when I grow The tide of age will bury me deep And my innocence will go to sleep Never knew the stages of love Holding her doesn’t mean u can kiss her now You are afraid that she might know She is scared, you might leave and go All these years that I have grown I’ve left behind parts of my own All of that now makes so much sense Intelligence is a loss of innocence

Kitni mayoosi hain in ankhon me Kitni udaasi Agar hame yeh pata hota ki chupate kaise hain Toh hum pyaar unhe karte jo yeh jaante hain ki nibhate kaise hain

We finished lunch. It was naptime of my thatha (grandpa). Naptime usually meant one thing story time. I rushed to my closet pulled out the latest Amar Chitra Katha that my dad had gotten and I ran to my thatha’s bench. We had a long bench in the drawing room and that was his resting spot. He looked at me with the usual smile on his face. He knew what I wanted. The bench could hardly fit that 6 footer man. We both lay side by side resting our heads on a couple of pillows. “So what did Bheema do till yesterday?” asked my thatha. I’d reply and hence began my introduction to the world of Ramayana, Mahabharatha and the whole set of affiliated stories. My grandpa was a great literate. He knew 14 languages and had won many a prize for literary work. He was the president of the Author’s Guild of India and our house never ran short of his guests and affiliates. He used to work as the personal secretary of Sri Rajagopalachari and a freedom fighter. His heroes were Mahathma Gandhi, Nehru, Tilak a...